“So, what did you do today?” I asked my daughter home from college as I started making dinner.
She grabbed her phone and shook it at me. “We’ve lost a roommate today. If we don’t get another one by the end of the week, we may have to sell our bodies, but don’t worry, I’ll manage.”
She dialed and I stood there stunned.
She made nice with the person on the other end. She listened, shook her head, and wrote something down. Then I heard her say, “I’m sorry that it is not going to work out.”
“Was she crazy?” I asked.
“Did she seem nasty?” I wondered
“Then what was wrong with her?”
“At first, I thought she was the one. She could cook, enjoyed cleaning, had a 401K at age 20 but…?”
“But what?” I asked.
“She didn’t have a microwave pasta cooker and a subscription for Hulu.”
“Aren’t you being a little picky?” I asked.
“Mom, this is just how it is these days. You have to have rules before letting people join your group. She has to be able to cook. Not just ‘ordinary’ cook either. We need her to be able to make a feast out of microwave popcorn, three eggs, and a leftover quesadilla. She must be able to do laundry between the hours of 4 and 5 pm. She must be able to read lips, not sweat in borrowed clothes, and love the music by Jon Bellion. When inviting a boy over to work on a project, she must secure that they will bring a friend or a snack, preferably a snack. That’s all.” she said as she snapped a picture.
“Wow.” I tried to not look shocked. “I’m curious what you bring to the group?”
“Granny’s frozen dinners, a wireless printer, and a dad that can fix things. Duh! And don’t worry mom, I’ll manage.”
Scenario 1: Allyson